| Funnies of Life |
Feb 5, 2007 3:51 am
Mood: amused, 860 Views | Now that food has replaced \bsexo?\b in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.
Marriage changes passion.
Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it
So I said "Implants?" She hit me.
How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America ?
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Wow...that was fun!"
I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!
When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."
Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.
Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over? AMEN, AMEN !!
Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?
Wouldn't you know it...
Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FATcells live forever.
Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside?
And remember: life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes. | |
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| Deja Vu |
Feb 4, 2007 7:44 am
Mood: amused, 812 Views | Ok I believe a lot, but what I saw in the movie 'Deja Vu' was totally over the top. Ok, ok, it's just a movie and I agree. But I do think the regular movie goers are a little smarter then the fine movie makers apparently think we are. Go see the movie for Denzel Washington and forget the rest. Ok I had to say this. I am not the smartest guy on the block, but time travel can be done better in movies, and more believable. Leave out Einstein and all the theoretical mumbo-jumbo and leave it as a story of love wrapped in a thriller jacket and it would be a lot better. But that's just my few cents. I had a nice night nevertheless though Pretty amusing
Any thoughts about Deja Vu as in the actual phenomenon? | |
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| Hot water |
Feb 1, 2007 11:15 am
795 Views | | The warm water is gliding over my body, leaving a trace of wetness and delight. With a wash cloth filled with foam I brush my skin, making it clean. I shampoo my hair and I feel like a new born guy. As you've guessed.. I like taking a shower. I can stand underneath it all day if I had all the time in the world and a skin resisting the dryness of water. So now I only take a shower when ever I can within my daily schedule. But there was a time I could stand underneath it for hours. I drove my parents up the walls. The water was even pouring out of the bathroom onto the dry floor outside. I just pretended the bathroom floor to be a private pool filled with hot water. I would sit there or lay there and just enjoy the water falling on my naked body and thinking about nothing at all. I have a thing with water. Even in the swimming pool I'm always more under then above the water. I just love that feeling of being weightless. It's a totally different world and I can be myself. Oh how I long for a hot bath right now. | |
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| Sammi |
Jan 28, 2007 6:33 am
912 Views | I am 37 and according to the rules of society, I already should have a family. I am not someone who is following rules, so I don't have a girlfriend or kids. But people always do say I am good with kids. I don't know about that part though, because it still feels weird when I hold a tiny bundle of joy in my big hands, but still kids can make a person forget his or her problems for awhile.
I was at my Grandma's house today (I know.. I lead a boring life). We had coffee, some cookies and we talked. At some point my aunt visited with her grandson Sammi. It was the second time I saw Sammi and he had grown. He's 5 months now and smiles a lot. So my Grandma gave him a furry rabbit and right away he chewed on it's ears with a smile from ear to ear. He had a good time and was jumping up and down on the lap of his own Grandma.
At some point she gave him to me and I must say, it was fun. He is bald, has a big face with red cheeks (a lot like me hehe) and I was joking he looked a lot like Buddha. My aunt said we only needed to paint him gold to make him look like a real Buddha 
So I talked with Sammi, he drooled over me, he was jumping up and down and he and I had a good time. So even though I am not used to kids, at least it's what I think, it is nice to be a dad some day. I know I would already be protective and would make her or him the center of my world, but until that time it's just nice to observe. It maybe never happen, but who knows.. maybe some day I will be the dad everyone is telling me I could be.
Ps.. no photo of Sammi sadly. I need to make one soon | |
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| Love to be a DJ |
Jan 26, 2007 1:56 am
819 Views | This morning I woke up with music. When I'm in bed in the morning, I always listen to a radio show, for the stories, the jokes and the music. And this time I heard a nice trance song. It made me think about how I liked dance music and going to clubs when I was younger. I love to dance. I can dance on many tunes, but trance music really can bring me in a trance. I am one with the music when I hear the exciting acid-like tunes and the house beats. I forget the world around me and I dance.
Maybe I also like it so much because I always wanted to be a DJ. At some point I had my own radio show at a local radio station, but that was only for a very short time. I rather mixed the records together. And back then i even did that with tapes. Pretty ancient when you think of it now, but it as fun.
Aside from the mixing, I also made some house tunes on my Amiga computer. I know I can make them much better now, simply because the equipment is better. But it was just a lot of fun and this song in the morning reminded me again that I should try it again. | |
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| Just be |
Jan 24, 2007 12:44 am
828 Views |  | Someone nice reminded me of my youth. It was a time full of ups and downs, but most of it I forgot. There was a time I had blond hair. In fact it was as white as chalk and pretty long. Must have been a 70s thing to have long hair. I was 5 and had nothing to say about it. So my parents were goofing around with my hair and took a photo of me wearing pony tails. Time heals all wounds, but photo's don't lie. So I saw it and I still make people laugh with that photo. I am guessing it was a happy time. A time how a youth should be. But as I grew older, I started to move away from them. As a family we were OK I guess, but I was lonely and the bonding between me and my family wasn't strong anymore. My parents had a boat and every weekend they spend their time there. In my younger years I went along. But as I grew older I stayed home and got a key. Here we call that a key child, which basically means that I had the key of the house for the times my parents weren't there. My friends didn't had a key. They had their parents. So I grew lonely. Not that I blame my parents for this though, but sometimes things follow a certain path and it is hard to get off that path. I became a shy and lonely boy.
I still remember the times of my dad's birthday. My mom used to make her own special potato salad (and she still does) and family and friends came for the food. So the house used to be filled with people and I was always upstairs in my room. At a certain point I tried to sneak in the living room to get some salad. But of course I was always noticed and with a red head and full of shame I got some salad and left again, to eat it in my safe bedroom. I had grown too shy to face them, even though they all meant it in a good and jokingly way.
Now I am older and I am still shy. I can hide it on line and even for my friends from time to time, but after yesterday I know I am still a shy guy.
Especially when it comes to girls. I had Spanish class and it's just 4 guys and like 8 girls. They are all nice, but I am known to like strangers pretty fast, so one of the girls I met outside the classroom, while I was shopping groceries. I talked, I said the wrong things and I thought 'hmm.. she is pretty nice'. So I wanted to make a comment about her birthday yesterday, but I couldn't. There wasn't an opportunity and I didn't create one. I really suck when it comes to girls. Even on here I pretend to be someone who isn't shy, but the truth is that in real life I couldn't say to the nice girls on here what I can say on line. It is a shame, because there are some nice girls on here. But I'm not gonna tell who The secret is hidden within the shyness.
But I have good hopes. There has been a past, but there isn't yet a future. A future is something we create ourselves and now I am totally aware of what I do, so I won't be a key child anymore and I will try to crawl out of my dark corner and try to face the world. For the most part I do like who I am and the best person I can be is just myself. |
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| Girls night out |
Jan 23, 2007 4:40 am
Mood: amused, 783 Views | Two women friends had gone for a girl's night out.
Both were very faithful and loving wives. However, they had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi Breezers.
Incredibly drunk, and walking home, they needed to pee, so they stopped in the cemetery.
One of them had nothing to wipe with, so she thought she would take off her panties and use them. Her friend, however was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin them.
She was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with a ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with that.
After the girls did their business, they proceeded to go home. The next day one of the women's husbands was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed -- hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said, "These girl
nights have got to stop! I'm starting to suspect the worst.. My wife came home
with no panties!!" "That's nothing" said the other husband, "Mine came back with a card stuck to her \bass\b that said..... "From all of us at the Fire Station. We'll never forget you." | |
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| Storm in Holland |
Jan 19, 2007 3:33 am
818 Views |  | There was a storm over Holland. It all started as a simple warning. We don't have many storms in Holland. In fact, all the tsunami's, earthquakes or volcano eruptions happening in the world, are impossible to occur in Holland. So things are relatively safe. But the storm was a surprise. So the warning was ignored and most people went to work. During the day the storm grew bigger and destroyed the roof of the central train station of Amsterdam. Because of the dangers the police closed it and no train could go in and out anymore. I work in Amsterdam, so I have to rely on the trains. I go through Utrecht and that was still safe, but by the end of my working day, this station was also closed. I was stuck at work.
Luckily I was stuck with two co-workers, so we decided to wait, in the hope things would clear up. It didn't. At 8 we went for some McDonald's junk food, just to fill the stomach and tried our luck at the train station again. When we arrived, it was announced that there couldn't ride any trains anymore throughout the whole country, because of the danger. So I started to call friends and family and my co-workers did the same. I couldn't get a ride, but one co-worker had a brother who was nice enough to take us to the house of the second co-worker. And this second co-worker brought us home. So it was a long night filled with waiting, falling trees, five deaths and over a million euros in damage. But at least I know now on which co-workers I can rely |
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| Ups and Downs |
Jan 18, 2007 2:24 am
802 Views | | I got a raise. Yay me. I am always happy when people appreciate what I am doing, but yesterday I also learned that my co-workers aren't always too happy with me. This is strange because it is something my boss never told me. Bad comments are equal as good as Good comments. In life we need both. There needs to be a balance. The Bad are there to learn and the Good are there to motivate. So it is never a good thing to have too much of either one of them. So I was down because I want to do everything perfect. I am not a highly educated person. I wish I was. I like learning, but nothing seems to stick in my head and some things are just too hard for me to grasp. So all I have to rely on is being street smart, but this is a much longer road then following the educational one. It also means re-inventing the wheel, which can create problems within a working environment. Some people understand and others don't. And of course I am not always too open about the 'flaws' in my character. So yesterday was a bad day, but every day is a new challenge for me. Because things can always go better then the day before. So there's nothing much to loose for me to try again | |
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| My vacation plans |
Jan 15, 2007 5:19 am
Mood: cheerful, 911 Views | I have vacation plans. It will take awhile before I'm able to realize them, but it is always nice to make dreams before they are actually happening. So I dream of a vacation in China. I will most likely go to China around May since that's a good period; not too hot and not too cold. I will go with a friend and as part of a small travel group. It will be exiting and a great opportunity to meet new people and learn about a different culture at the same time. I am a curious people, so I like a challenge. I will keep everyone posted of my antics of course.
See.. I am already happy just thinking about it | |
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