| Are we there yet? |
Dec 12, 2006 5:19 am
747 Views | I think the busy period has left us at work. I am listening to some Christmas songs and dream away of far away places with snow, a nice and warm fireplace, some wine heating in the licking flames, a cozy chair and ofcourse the songs I'm hearing right now.
'Santa Baby', sings Madonna in my left ear.
Music can really touch my soul. I usually have a hard time relaxing, but with some nice tunes in my ears I drift away.
Just 3 hours left and I can go home again. Yay!! | |
|
0 Comments | |
| It's that time again |
Dec 6, 2006 11:59 pm
763 Views | It's the season to be jolly, tra-la-lalalaaa' Well you know how the rest goes. But it's right.. the Christmas season has started again. I must honestly say that I'm not in a Christmas mood yet. But that is probably because the last couple of months the weather has basically lost it's way. Times of cold tuned into times of heat, times of snow turned into times of rain, the flowers and the butterflies still think it's summer, while it's clearly not. So a lot of things have changed and this also happened with my Christmas feeling. I need snow and people gently smiling to eachother. But I am missing all that. So as of today I decided to play Christmas songs on my computer, so I still have a personal Christmas.
What are your plans for Christmas this year? | |
|
0 Comments | |
| Eight words with 2 meanings |
Dec 6, 2006 3:20 am
779 Views | Eight Words with two Meanings
1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female..... Any part under a car's hood.
Male... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.
2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male.... Playing football without a cup.
3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.
4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.
5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.
6. FLATULEN CE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female... An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
Male...... A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.
7 MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female...... The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male.. Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.
8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.
AND;
He said . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said . . . You wear pants don't you?
He said . . ... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said ... That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!
He said . ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said . .Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said . ..... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
She said . ... They don't have time
He said . . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
She said . . We don't know; it has never happened.
He said . . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
She said . . . They already have boyfriends.
She said...What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
He said . . . A widow.
He said . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women?
She said . . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge. | |
|
1 comment | |
| Golf |
Nov 28, 2006 4:59 am
773 Views | A man, while playing on the front nine of a complicated golf course, became confused as to where he was on the course. Looking around,
he saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her, explained his confusion and asked her if she knew what hole he was playing.
She replied, "I'm on the 7th hole, and you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole."
He thanked her and went back to his golf.
On the back nine the same thing happened; and he approached her again with the same request. She said, "I'm on the 14th hole, you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 13th hole." Once again he thanked her and returned to his play.
He finished his round and went to the clubhouse where he saw the same lady sitting at the end of the bar. He asked the bartender if he knew the lady.
The bartender said that she was a sales lady and played the course often.
He approached her and said, "Let me buy you a drink in appreciation for your help. I understand that you are in the sales profession.
I'm in sales, also. What do you sell?"
She replied, "If I tell you, you'll laugh."
"No, I won't," he responded.
"Well, if you must know," she answered, "I work for Tampax."
With that, he laughed so hard he almost lost his breath while his sides ached and his face turned bright red.
She said, "See, I knew you would laugh."
"That's not what I'm laughing at," he replied. "I'm a salesman for Preparation H.. so I'm still a hole behind you. | |
|
0 Comments | |
| You know you are living in 2006 when you...... |
Nov 22, 2006 11:21 am
803 Views | 1. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the f irst 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
12. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
13. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
14. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.
AND NOW U R LAUGHING at yourself. | |
|
0 Comments | |
| Amazing home remedies |
Nov 20, 2006 11:16 am
806 Views | 1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto the blockage will be almost instantly removed.
2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.
4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.
5. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.
7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache.
Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
*If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.*If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
Some people are like Slinkies...Not really good for anything, but still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.
Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.
And finally, be really nice to your family and friends; you never know when you might need them to empty your bedpan. | |
|
0 Comments | |
| Dutch government |
Nov 14, 2006 11:59 pm
822 Views | Today is a day of strike. The trams, metros and buses are on strike. It's because of the competitive market position the government is planning to make achievable for the people in the public transportation services. It is annoying, but I am behind the people in operating the buses, the metros and the trams. Over the past years the government already gave the power to the train corporation and it turned out to be a disaster. Prices raised and riding on time has been a fantasy ever since. Of course the government wants to introduce good competitive positions, but there are no competitors and instead of lowering their prices, they just make everything more expensive. The latter is something also visible in every shop here in Holland.
It's time for a new government. | |
|
0 Comments | |
| x-mas break |
Nov 14, 2006 3:24 am
791 Views | It is the end of the year.. well not really, but in company-land it is. So this means that all our clients are stressing us to produce their products ASAP. They want to close their fiscal year as soon as possible. So this means that I am busy, busy and busy and no one is really working in a very constructive way. Oh how I long for the X-mas break  | |
|
0 Comments | |
| DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!! |
Nov 11, 2006 11:06 am
784 Views | Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a
repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the
key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the
bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check."
"Oh, by the way, don't worry about my bulldog,
Spike. He won't bother you.
But,whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY
circumstances, talk to my parrot!"
I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!" Wanda warned the repairman.
When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he has ever seen. But,
just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.
The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time
with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling. Finally the repairman couldn't
contain himself any longer and yelled,
"Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!"
To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"
Moral of the story: Men just don't listen!!! | |
|
0 Comments | |
| A simple riddle |
Nov 7, 2006 9:40 am
906 Views | A riddle for the day
Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one.
Michael J. Fox has a small one.
Madonna doesn't have one.
The Pope has one but doesn't use it.
Clinton uses his all the time.
Bush is one
Mickey Mouse has an unusual one.
Liberace never used his on women.
Jerry Seinfeld is very, very proud of his.
Cher claims that she took on 3.
We never saw Lucy use Desi's.
What is it? Answer below!
The answer is: "A Last Name."
You didn't really think I'd send you a dirty joke, did you !! | |
|
3 Comments | |
| To link to this blog (muffles) use [blog muffles] in your messages. |
|
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
| |
|
1
|
21
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
71
|
8
|
91
|
101
|
111
|
12
|
13
|
141
|
151
|
16
|
171
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
31
|
|
|
|
|
